I don’t know why I’m so hurt.  I had this kid in my class, one whom I love dearly, flip me off behind my back.  I know part of my pain is because, more than any other kid, he’s the one who I’ve prayed for the most.  I know he has a high calling and I guess the Lord has just highlighted him in my heart.  There’s a spiritual connection there, I know, because of the energy and time I’ve put into interceding on his behalf.

  God, I don’t want complacency and carnality as the definition of the rest of his life!  He was made for a different reality!  Oh God, why?  Why did it have to be him?  Why is he being attacked to forcefully?

  I guess my email to all the coaches a few weeks ago was kind of a “game on!” sign in the spirit.  So, I can venture a guess that this happened with me because I’m the one who has a tender heart towards him – I know it has to get dealt with.  And maybe this is the open door to change that I’ve been praying for.  But so painful!  It was an interesting commentary on how powerful my emotions are – maybe it’s because I give them control too much or it just is a result of being very in tune with my emotions.  But it shut me down!  Thankfully, it was in the last few minutes of class, so they had seatwork to do, but it was seriously debilitating for me.  I wanted to throw everyone out a window and scream.  Debilitating.

  But I know this is what I’ve been asking for.  I’ve prayed for his heart, and God is bringing it to light – he has a a huge ton of bitterness and unforgiveness and it’s EATING at him!  Consuming him!  Oh God, let him see.  Give him sight!  Do not let your words that he has heard be rooted in his heart.  Now is the hour.  The fullness of time has come.  Have you way.